Merry Christmas, movie house! Merry Christmas, Emporium! Merry Christmas, you wonderful old Building and Loan!

For you Nintendo Wii owners, you lucky bastards, the Opera browser just became active today — meaning you can browse the web in addition to playing those awesome motion-sensing games like bowling, driving, tennis, zelda, etc. i want it.i want it.i want it. When the Wiis are back on the shelves in January, I’m gettin’ me one. No doubt about it.

:divbar:

“Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows” is the name of the final chapter in the life of the now 37 year old Harry Potter. The movie will be available for instant SHD (super high def) download on your fiber company’s Netflix menu in October 2012.

If you don’t believe me, play the JK Rowling puzzle on her website to figure it out for your own damn self.

:divbar:

So you’re somewhere in the country, it’s Christmas Day, everything is closed… what the hell do you do? Play games. Meh. Read? Feh. Talk to your family? Zuh. (I love you, Zager family)

Watch TV that’s what. — either on a computer or on an actual TV.

Here’s what’s on:

The G4 Network is airing an “Arrested Development” marathon on Christmas Day this year.
Get all the Buster and G.O.B. Bluth you can handle!

EVERY episode of “Heroes” is available in a beautiful, flowing, glistening stream on NBC.COM.

“A Christmas Story” loops for 24-hours on TNT

The Yule Log on INHD and WPIX

FX is running “Ice Age” non stop on Xmas day — kinda random.

At 2pm on ESPN2 is the National Spelling Bee

On the Discovery channel, “MythBusters” is airing the top viewer’s choice episodes.

..and of course 1,000 other channels. I’m not frickin’ TV guide here, people.

Just givin’ you a little TASTE.

:divbar:

My new favorite: Movie-a-Minute — it condenses a multi-million dollar production into a few brief sentences. Accurate? Not really. Funny? Yes.

Here’s the synopsis for Deep Impact:

Producers
Studio People, we are almost done with our introspective movie about the end of the world.

Studio People
Wait, producers. We see that the upcoming Armageddon will be filled with glitzy multimillion dollar special effects. You must add scenes of people blowing up the asteroid.

Producers
But shoehorning those scenes in will make our film seem unfocused and pointlessly derivative.

Studio People
So?

THE END

:divbar:

Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, and Happy New Year to you and your families.

Thank YOU to all the martyz.com fans out there and for making martyz.com the #1 blog…

… in my house.

I’ll see you for an Xmas WRAP-up on Wednesday, 12/27 — oh yeah… I get the 26th off, suckas.

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• Marty Z...

  • strolling with ZeZ - looking forward to beer and Independence Day cupcakes - wherever they may be. 2009/07/02
  • it's grill-o'clock! 2009/06/24
  • Is growing a sweet Father's Day 'stache. 2009/06/20
  • wishes you and yours a happy digital transition. 2009/06/12
  • Zoe comes home with us today! Eager to get her outta here and spoil her properly. 2009/06/12
  • has a case of the fridays. TGIF and all that. 2009/05/29
  • Happy Star Wars Day. May the 4th be with you. 2009/05/04
  • It's prom night! Anyone else seen awkward teenagers in formal wear? 2009/05/02
  • @hodgman do you have a particular beverage of choice to aid in throat cleansing/moistening whilst recording for many hours? Ovaltine? Gin? 2009/04/30
  • @michaeldayers he was one of my favorites from "Scrooged" 2009/04/23

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